Skaters and Drugs Outtakes: Duane Peters

This one is pretty heavy. Here's Duane Peters' take from back in '03. Photo: From the TWS 30th Anniversary Issue. Duane was number 23 on our list of most influential skateboarders of all time.—ME

DUANE PETERS:

“If you’re interested in drugs, you’re going to experiment. In my case, punk rock was really new. I was young. I came from a broken home and skateboarding was already a good outlet from that. I started drinking real early. I really liked the (Sex) Pistols. I liked Sid Vicious. I liked the destructiveness of it. It looked appealing and attractive. As soon as heroin came around I was in. I found it and it found me.”

“I know plenty of guys that smoke weed and will never try heroin. It’s a matter of whether you enjoy upping the stakes. If you do, there’s going to be price to pay. The maze of life gets harder. You could end up dead. It all depends on the luck of the draw. In my case, it totally took over my life. I was completely satisfied with drugs. I became everything I never wanted to be. At a certain point, you cross the line and there’s no way out. You can’t even leave your house without it.”

“I wasted so many years. I did jail time. Heroin made a wreck out of everything around me. Right off the bat, you hurt the ones you love. You do anything you can for a fix.”

“I was sixteen-years-old, doing the Skateboard Mania show and I had television producers shoving coke spoons up my nose. All of a sudden, you’re at mansions on the hills with Hollywood types and model chicks. They’ve got living rooms with Jacuzzis and water falls in the bathrooms and some producer is putting coke up your nose and pouring you drinks. What are you gonna do? You’re going to fuckin’ whip it.”

“It wasn’t until shooting up came in that you really had to hide it. I’d be at a nice house and somebody would draw a line of coke on the table and I’d ask them, ‘Is this line mine? Because if it is I’m going to do what I want with it.’ I’d scoop it up, take it in the bathroom, get my rig out and shoot it. Then I’d go back and ask for another one. Next thing you know, I’m not at any of the parties anymore. I’m a complete loner and I’m homeless. You finally have a wake up call and your pushing a shopping cart, hiding some fucking blanket you found because you think somebody is going to steal it, and people are calling you a bum.”

“I was shooting up, living in a ditch and got rushed by these three Mexicans for a piece of shit watch that didn’t even work. They stabbed me seven times in the knee and three times in the back with these fucking shanks. I was swinging my board around at these fuckers and the funniest thing was I was rushing so much from the coke that I couldn’t climb out of this four-foot ditch. I finally got these guys off me and I was running down the street covered in blood when the cops came. I had three warrants but they told me to get the fuck out of there. They wouldn’t take me in their car because I was such a fucking mess. You have to use your imagination but everything bad that could happen happened to me”

“I used up all my tokens early. When they’re gone you don’t get anymore. Take it easy and you can make the party last your whole life. Otherwise, you end up with some big decisions and you can’t have it both ways. My statement to the world is ‘Don’t use up all your tokens.’"

Skaters and Drugs Outtakes: Andy Roy

Here's Andy Roy talking candidly about Heroin addiction in '03. Andy has cleaned up a couple of times and is hopefully done with this beast for good. Was stoked to see him have a guest trick in the Deathwish video. Again, the original Skateboarder article is here. Photo: Tobin Yelland

ANDY ROY:

“They (Skateboarders) don’t have no responsibility, you know. They just get paid to go skateboard. You don’t have no schedules. You can sleep in if you want. You don’t got no one telling you what to do. There’s all the traveling you know and you’re on the streets. Then you got like the street drug dealers. They’re always out to make money.”

“What happened to me was, I grew up with all my friends, and they didn’t have an opportunity to go and do what I did, like traveling and skating, so they just stuck around Santa Cruz and they would drink and smoke weed. The next thing you know heroin hit my crew big time. I came back from a skate trip and they were like here try it. I tried to smoke it and at first I didn’t understand it, I didn’t like it. I would keep coming back from trips and one time I broke my foot, went home to visit, and just never left. I got sucked in.”

“It’s a physical drug. I got hooked. At first we were just smoking it and then eventually you don’t get high anymore so you take it to the next level. The first time I shot up was with Jay (Adams). It’s a heavy thing. Its like whatever pains you have, physical or mental, it takes them away. Its like the best high at first. But then you do it three days in a row, and if you stop, you’re going to feel it. You get anxiety, you get cramps in your legs, you can’t sleep at night. All you do is think of that drug, that high, and than you’re body just freaks out and you have to go do it. You’re like a complete slave to it.”

“Its everywhere. It’s in every town. You can’t believe it. Business people do it, like some people you can’t even imagine. Some people can just hold it, and other people can’t. Me, whatever I do, I take it to the fullest. Heroin led me to the gutter. I lost everything.”

“Finally, I’m doing good. I’ve relapsed so many times and said that I’m done with it. But I’m 31-years-old now. I’ve met a new girl that doesn’t mess around. She’s beautiful. I don’t have that craving no more. I’ve been threatened with prison, like, if I get in trouble again, I’m gone. I’m just tired of running around and just hustling for money everyday. Its so stressful that you can only take so much. I think my body has just given up. I can’t do it no more. It wore me out.”

“It doesn’t take all those rehabs and all that to be done with it. You just have to decide in your head.”

“I’ve seen people give up all their belongings. I’ve seen people steal from their own parents. I’ve seen people give up their dignity. I’ve seen men do sexual favors you know, its just gross. The horror stories wouldn’t even make it into your magazine. It’s just disgusting. It makes you into an evil person. It takes your pride and your soul, and you just wait for that next fix. You’ll do whatever it takes. I was on the streets. I went from traveling and skateboarding to having nothing. It’s such a violent world—just straight gutter.”

Skaters and Drugs Outtakes: Ed Templeton

As promised, here's Ed's collection of raw quotes from '03. Once again, you can read the whole final version of the article here. Coming up, there are some really good ones from Duane Peters, BA, Marc Johnson, Dave Carnie, Dressen, TA, Dyrdek, Gino, Berra, and tons more I'll keep posting up as I get the time. Thanks for reading. Photo: Templeton —ME

ED TEMPLETON:

"Skateboarding has at times been extremely involved with drugs. It’s about youth and it’s about coming to that age where experimentation happens. At one point, I feel like there was like a critical mass in skateboarding on pot. It was almost like if you were a skater, you smoked pot by default. Now, with skating getting more mainstream, it has been scaled back a little. But, that doesn’t mean it isn’t happening."

"The majority of it has to do with the people getting paid to do it. Your average kid trying to get sponsored isn’t necessarily into drugs."

"It’s a lot of different things. It’s the money and the free time. You have a job that doesn’t require that you look good, or be coherent. You can’t show up to regular jobs with bloodshot eyes."

"I’ve personally watched kids go from innocent 15 year old skate rats to full hooker, booze and drugs users in a year."

"The rock star dudes live the rock star life. It’s always been like that. Hosoi used to always have two rooms at every hotel they stayed at. One for sleeping and the other just for partying. Nobody would sleep. The rock n’ roll mold gets into the drug element by default."

"Some people can handle skating and partying—drinking or smoking weed. Like you seriously wouldn’t know they’re stoners or even alcoholics. But then there are dudes that just can’t deal with it. They start to suck at skating because of their habits. As a company owner I’ve had instances with riders where I had no choice but to address it."

"Pot can just drain you’re energy if it affects you that way. Guys just sitting around playing video games all day don’t get coverage."

"As a parent, I wouldn’t say skating is any worse then something like basketball or football. If you’re taking your kid to the Vans park everyday, he’s not going to be around drugs. It depends who he’s hanging with."

Skaters and Drugs Outtakes: Jeff Grosso

The next outtake from this 2003 Skateboarder article is one of my personal favorites—all around class act, Jeff Grosso. I Rememeber being so stoked when I got to do this in '03. I had never spoken to Jeff before and it seemed like every sentence out of his mouth was immediatly timeless. Pearls of wisdom from a guy that lived it. Enjoy. Below: Nosepick, Photo: O —ME

JEFF GROSSO:

“You’re alienated from the start, and skateboarding is a testament to that. I mean you don’t fit in anywhere, a lot of kids are from broken homes, so you pick up a skateboard to try to fit in elsewhere. Coming from a place of rebellion or alienation sets the tone for any drug addict. You’re already isolated. They hate you, you hate them, you hate yourself, so what else to do but destroy yourself in order to get back at them.”

“There are people with addictive personalities and there are people that can do something a couple times and just walk away. Unfortunately, with drugs, you don’t know if you have the physical makeup of an addict until you try them.”

“I had a buddy from high school that went to architecture school at USC. He turned me onto cocaine. He’d sit there and do line for line with me, smoke the shit, whatever. One day he just turned around and was like, ‘Whatever, I’m over it.’ He could just walk away because he didn’t have that addictive trait. Me, I tried it once and it was like, ‘Stick a fork in me’ I couldn’t put the shit down. The rest was 15 years of pain and suffering.”

“In the 80s, there was basically two camps. You had the nerds, like Tony (Hawk), Lester (Kasai), and Kevin (Staab), and then you had the Hellraisers like Phillips, Craig Johnson, Gibson and all those dudes which were the cool guys. I was like extremely nerdy and obsessive about my skating but at the same time I wanted to be accepted. The first time I smoked weed was with Alan Losi and Neil Blender. When you’re 18-years-old, sitting there at with your childhood heroes, you’d pretty much do anything if you thought it would help you fit in. Its all about jumping off the bridge.”

“Skateboarding promotes self-destruction. I see it even with dudes today. You’re paid to be this clown. How much can you destroy, how gnarly can you get, how fucked up can you get. Everybody just watches from the sidelines, like cheering you on. And you’re supposed to walk this line. Like you’re supposed to get as f—ked up as possible and still skate your best on call. Then, the second you loose your value as a skateboarder, everybody turns their back on you. You’re the next casualty.”

“They started handing me $65,000 a year at 17. I mean, really, I was doomed.”

“You can’t blame anybody else if you have drug problems. If you can’t take the f—king heat, then you better get the f—k out of the kitchen. And if you’re to stupid to get out of the kitchen, then you deserve what you get. That was my problem. I was like, ‘Hey, I’ll just burn up in here,’ and I did. The next thing you know you’re sticking needles in your arm and you’re a fucking lowlife.’”

“Skateboarding is just young and naïve. Other sports have the same problems, they just have better damage control. I mean if a football player goes out with a couple of hookers and an eight ball of coke and wraps his fucking Ferrari around a tree, they have guys paid to come in, pay off the hookers, take care of hospital bills, keep the guy out of jail, and keep the story out of the press because Nike has an investment in their athlete. In skateboarding, they just cut their losses and grab a new kid. That’s changing now. But it’s still far from being fixed.”

“It’s this trap people fall into. Like it’s the dark side of human nature. We like to sit and watch somebody else fall down, and we laugh along, encouraging it and pushing it further. Then we go home to our homes or whatever and think, ‘God, that was cool hanging out with so and so while he self-destructed.’ But it never even registers that that person doesn’t have another home to go to, that they’re stuck in this 24-hour party.”

“I only lasted about three or four good years at the top. Then I knew my ride was over. But like Hosoi, I ran around for another ten years living off my name in the seedy underbelly of the skate world. Like, ‘Oh you’re that professional skateboard dude’ I’d be like ‘Hell yeah, that’s me.’ Meanwhile I hadn’t stepped on a board in like 6 months. ‘But, hey, you got a pocket full of drugs and you want to party with me because I’m so-and-so. Oh, by the way, can I sleep on your couch. And I’m gonna steal your VCR in the morning when you’re passed out, because I need to go get more drugs.”

“All you can really do is share your experiences. Try to make some of the younger kids aware. But at the end of day I can only speak for myself. When I was young, I f—king knew it all, I had it all, it was never going to end, and I was going to be king of the world. There was nothing that was going to knock me off. Turn around, and I’m 34 years old, I struggle to pay my bills, and life just didn’t turn out the way I had planned."

"When you’re lost in heroin, and you haven’t reached any sort of bottom, you just can’t see out of it. You have to get an extreme amount of pain before you can accept anybody else’s help. Something like 15 percent of heroin addicts, even the ones that are able to get off it for even a couple years, end up relapsing and ultimately dying from it."

"With skateboarding, there’s so much physical pain involved that its easy to fall into. One day somebody gives you a Vicodine because you got a hipper and right there you get a taste for opiates. Then you move on up the ladder."

"We got a bunch of guys that just died over this shit. And even for those of us that got out, its like what do you have left? You’re physically and mentally wrecked from it, me being one of them. You’re by no means a success story. You just try to get your life back together after the big crash."

If you want even more Grosso tales, here's another column I got to do for TWS last October:

What it Feels Like: To Die 3 Times w/ Jeff Grosso

Skaters and Drugs Outtakes: Brad Staba

Another full interview from the Skaters and Drugs batch. Here's Brad Staba talking pretty candidly about the topic back in 2003. Photo: Ed Templeton. I'll put up Ed's text in a few. —ME

BRAD STABA:

“I have terrible allergies which give me headaches all the time. So I smoke a lot of grass to deal with that. Under Proposition 215 in California I was lucky enough to get my medical marijuana certificate and can go to the numerous cannabis clubs around up here. It’s all computerized, you go in, and they hand you like a pill bottle just like any other prescription. I don’t have to sit in front of some sketchy dude's house and wait for his broke ass to get up anymore to buy weed.”

“I’m the kind of guy that smokes grass and can’t sit still. Like if I go skate, I smoke, and play some music and it just sets it off for me. Even with like taking photos or playing music, smoking just slows everything down for me and lets me focus on working at things little by little.”

“Its like in skating you really only hear about it when its like the real addicts who ended up on heroin.”

“If you’re trying to juggle doing like hard drugs and skating, it’s almost like a circus act. I mean you’re juggling two different lives, you know. You almost have to keep choosing between skating and being a pile of shit. ‘Hey, now I skate. Now I’m a pile of shit.’ I think its kind of a joke, but whatever. Do whatever the hell you want, I say. I really never even followed skating to that point. Even when I was a kid I wasn’t like, ‘oh, I want to be like Claus Grabke because he snorts coke.’”

“I take Adavan and Klonopin for anxiety attacks. Ask any professional skateboarder if they’ve ever had anxiety attacks. If they say no, they’re lying. You go to these huge demos, like in Japan or somewhere and sometimes it’s just too much. All these people criddlin’ on your shit. These things are like all common things but if you take the medication for them people look at you like you're fucked up or something. I just have it under control. Weed can totally help your anxiety, depending on how much you smoke. If you smoke too much it’s just like any other medication—you get fucked up by the side effects.”